Yes, I was away !! Away as in not in some soul searching mystic journey to realize "man's search for meaning" a.l.a Eric Berne !! I was away coz I was lost.. I was waiting and watching !! Just like a mouse waiting for the pet cat to run off to its bowl of milk, before making its sprint to the crumbs lying a few feet away !! Maybe not realizing that the our Mr. pet-home-cat might just be too fat to lunge at the rat !! Same situation !! I was waiting for something to run off to its bowl of milk !! I am not sure what but it was that might have appeared as frightful to the mouse as the house cat !!
The wait did have it's own moments of triumphs !! It gave a lot of time to lose up on precious things just to know what it felt like to lose them !! At times its like watching myself on television
I guess I am still in limbo after all !! Well one thing for sure as of now .. I don't believe in the tooth-fairy at the bottom of the garden anymore .. no more Santa-Claus for me anymore.. I would have loved to believe in the rotund personality bringing gifts for obedient children, but then the monstrosity of reason devours my ignorance at all once and the meek naked me feels the cold bite of the wintry wind.. making me curling my torso into a fetal self-embrace... Guess that's how it feels to be in limbo after all !!
